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The Abortionist

Wizardary Suspected in Kansas

Ernest Lies

Pregnant Kansan women residing throughout the US have been resorting to wizardary to return home to Kansas for access to abortions following the striking of down of a proposed constitutional amendment (2 August) that would have restricted abortion in the state and a subsequent re-count that re-affirmed the original vote.

Women as far afield as New York, Los Angeles and Honolulu have been seen wearing red shoes and clicking their heels together while shouting “There’s no place like home! There’s no place like home! There’s no place like home!” in the same manner that transported Dorothy back to Kansas in the Wizard of Oz.

Kansas state authorities have refused to confirm or deny the effacacy of the wizardary. However, Kansas pro-life activists claim that the vote result and the re-count were both influenced by the use of ‘dark arts’.