The Abortionist

How Abortion CEO job description should have read.

Sophie Clamp

BPAS Board of Trustees recently appointed Clair Murphy as their new CEO after advertising the role online.  Now the BAAS is also advertising for the role.

The British Abortion Advisory Service (BAAS) has claimed that the BPAS job advertisement was “a bit soft”.  BAAS HR director, Rele Idontcare, said, “BAAS are offering greater clarity to potential applicants for the top spot in our organisation. We are looking for that special leader who is deadly serious about abortion as a means of tackling the pregnancy pandemic.” The BAAS advert (see below) will run on major employment web sites from next week.

Vacancy: New Chief Executioner Executive Wanted 

Want to make an absolute killing? If so, we’ve got the job for you!”

BAAS are looking for a dynamic, committed CEO who is as passionate about killing unborn babies as the last one.  The successful candidate will need to demonstrate creativity and ambition for expanding our already very successful genocide.

The new CEO will work with a highly motivated executive team seeking to expand the number and efficiency of abortuaries nationwide, and to further criminalise ‘prolife creeps’ harassing women silently in prayer.  They will take every opportunity to inspire and empower women to kill their babies and to influence government and public opinion to support our vision for ever easier abortion availability at anytime, anywhere, by any means. And with a 100k salary to go with, it’s no surprise our last CEO described it as ‘the best job in the world’.

We are also VERY interested in their views on the possibilities of starting to kill babies during and after birth – and their appreciation of the potential of developing partnerships with those involved in other genocides such as of the elderly, disabled, or females. The board is keen to work with someone who can think outside the box – but of course, execution is everything”


Experience in genocide implementation; torture; violence against vulnerable people and/or child abuse extremely desirable.